Puzzle Pieces

puzzle pieces

to the woman i never knew, i thank You.
i can't recall the sound of Your voice,
or the smell of Your skin,
but i will forever feel Your undenying care.

You are a 1,000 piece puzzle,
but i’ve lost the box cover,
can’t seem to remember what Your face looks like,
and i’m scared i’ll never be able to finish it.
Your face, an unsolved mystery,
the only part of You left remaining
resides in me.

the last thing You did was bundle me in a soft blanket to keep me warm,
like a shield for protection and comfort.
You placed me down in the middle
of a hustling bustling bus station,
to ensure someone would find me.
Our very last moment together.

i wish You knew how much I loved You then,
and how much I love You now.
although i can’t express it to You
i think about You everyday.
i wish i could’ve known You.
i wish i could’ve remembered Your face,
come to learn everything that resembled You inside of me.

do i ever cross Your mind?
after 16 years have You ever wondered
what i liked, or if i smiled like You?
stereotypes paint children like me as
broken, abandoned, full of remorse,
but i empathize with a woman
who made the impossible decision
to sacrifice being a mother for my livelihood.

just 9 months later i was on a flight to California,
a change of scenery,
a new beginning,
leaving You behind.

to the woman i came to know, i thank you.
big blue eyes,
pale skin,
a kind hearted smile,
and loving arms,
you took me in.
everyday you cherished me,
protected me,
accepted me as your own
with zero pity.
i know you didn’t give me life,
but you taught me how to live it.
you’ve taught me more than you’ve ever known.
Mom, i love you.